The first reading recalls what was the beginning of all things. It tells it in a romantic way. Maybe it wasn’t exactly like that, but the most important thing is contained in that story: man and woman met and recognised each other. The look did not stop at the eyes. It reached the heart. Then began a story that lasts to this day. Both felt called to form one flesh, not only in order to procreate, but, beyond that, to live united in love.
There are situations in which two spouses wonder if it is still worth insisting on trying to fix a relationship that began badly and is proving to be irreparably broken. They no longer love each other, there are incompatibilities of character, they are mean to each other, speak only to offend, and even the children are involved in the failure of the parents. What sense does it make to continue together? Can God demand that we continue living together in a way that is a torment?
Human logic responds without hesitation: divorce is better. When so many couples separate after only a few years of marriage, isn’t cohabitation preferable? If things don’t work out, we break up without too many problems. In no other field, as in that of sexual ethics, is a person tempted to give himself so many excuses, characterised by so many “buts,” “ifs,” “it depends.”
Jesus invites us to go beyond human logic which is a creation of his own foolish reasoning and deteriorating behaviours introduced by people; and to consider sexuality in the light of God’s plan, revealed from the very first chapters of Genesis: “But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female. For this reason, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, no human being must separate” (vv. 6-9).
The Rabbis taught that the first precept given by God was that of procreation: “Be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28), and they considered this duty so fundamental that, if children were not born in a marriage, the husband had to send his wife back to have children with another woman. But Jesus affirmed in the most resolute way that no divorce is part of God’s plan. Men introduced rejection, which is an attempt to destroy the work of the Lord, who united man and woman in one flesh.
Since only God knows the frailty of each person, no one can set himself up as a judge of his brothers and sisters. Concrete situations must always be approached with prudence, and each person must be understood, accompanied, and helped so that he or she can give the best of himself/herself. Showing understanding and patience does not mean softening the Gospel’s demands or adapting to current morality but showing pastoral wisdom.
For your reflection
Do you know of cases of family violence near you? What have you done to try to help these couples respect each other? In your home, are you signs of God’s love?
Father Fernando Torres CMF
www.ciudadredonda.org
Translated by
Father Alberto Rossa CMF
