Way back in 2004, when I decided to enter into religious life, no one in the family agreed with my decision. “Yes, you can. Anyway, we can live without you,” were the words that came from my mother, which hurt me so badly. They are words from my mother, who is closest to my heart. Yes, from my mother! I cried in secret. All I wanted at that time was support from them, especially from nanay (mother). Those words were like a sharp knife that cut my heart, but I prayed in silence that somehow at least my mother would understand the life that I wanted to have and God wanted me to be. For days, we did not talk to each other, but it didn’t stop me either from my decision to enter the religious life.
The day came when I needed to leave. I finally said goodbye to her even though I didn’t know how she would react. My mother gave me a tight hug and kiss while crying. Here, I felt how my mother loves me! She said she didn’t have the intention to hurt me with her words. All she wanted was for me to stay because she could not live without me, not because of what I could do for the family, but because she loves me that much, and she wanted me so desperately by her side as if I were still her baby that needed a mother. She told me many things, reminded me of how I should behave and so on. All my resentment disappeared.
When the bus started moving, I saw her beautiful smile, allowing me to follow the path to which God had called me. Yet, at the same time, I saw in her eyes the pain of separation.
The love of a mother is great indeed. They have their own ways of showing their love for their children and we cannot compare
The love of a mother is great indeed. They have their own ways of showing their love for their children, and we cannot compare. There are mothers who don’t often say the magic word “I love you,” as they may not be expressive, but they manifest them in different ways. There are mothers who do not know how to prepare a delicious dessert or our favourite dish, or how to sing a lullaby or draw our favourite cartoon character, and worst are very strict when we were in our teenage years. Sometimes their principles are against ours, but still, they are trying their best to do their duty as a mother out of love for us.
Mothers sacrifice a lot for their children. A mother can be with us even in our difficult moments in life. A mother is happy with every success we achieve, and is the first person to get hurt when we fail. A mother is willing to give up her life for her child. From the moment of her conception up to giving birth, her life is at stake and yet she is happily waiting for her angel to be born in this world, to share her life with, to experience how beautiful life is that God has given us.
It is painful for a mother who has no time for their kids, especially those who are working abroad, taking care of other kids while their own are left behind. They really work so hard for their children so that they can have a good future.
There are times that we question them on how they raise their children, especially when they give their children a lot of material things to make up for the time that they were not able to give. But it is their way of showing how they are sorry for not being with them, especially during the time that they are needed most. They just chose to work overseas, which is what they think is good for their children. How difficult it is for them to explain that kind of situation.
Since I began to lead a consecrated life, she has been my prayer warrior, my partner. I am forever grateful to God for giving me a mother who is not perfect, not a professional, not rich or strict, but willing to sacrifice for my siblings and for me!
There is no perfect mother in this world, but no one can say that being a mother is easy. We cannot judge them, including even those mothers who abandon their babies in the trash can or in the orphanage. We do not know their intentions or what they were going through. All we have to do is to pray for them, ask for the intercession of the Blessed Mother Virgin Mary for their enlightenment, especially for our young mothers today, for those who are experiencing difficulties living a life of being a mother. May our Blessed Mother be their role model so that they may remember their nature and the role of what a mother is.
As we celebrate the 500 years of Christianity in the Philippines. The Chaplaincy to Filipino Migrants organises an on-line talk every Tuesday at 9.00pm. You can join us at:
https://www.Facebook.com/CFM-Gifted-to-give-101039001847033
Now my mother will be turning 83. I was given a chance to take care of her in her hardest time. I know she needs me most, but she understands what kind of life I have. She’s not worried about her health but about my responsibility in our community. Even though she loved me to stay longer by her side, she asked me to go back to where I had to. It was really hard for me to leave her behind now that she’s old and sick, but she let me go with a promise of prayers between us.
Since I began to lead a consecrated life, she has been my prayer warrior, my partner. I am forever grateful to God for giving me a mother who is not perfect, not a professional, not rich or strict, but willing to sacrifice for my siblings and for me!
Perhaps we are far from each other, but our hearts are being close together. The anxiety of separation will always be there, but there is hope and love that bind us together.
For those who still have a mother, love her. Show her the love which they deserve. For all the mothers out there, I salute, and I am proud of you! May God continue to bless you! Mama Mary loves you so do I!
Happy Mother’s Day to all, especially to my nanay, Julia Banquiles Carabot!
Sister Shailine Carabot
Daughters of Our Lady on Mount Calvary, Philippines
