by Cardinal Stephen Chow, S.J.
I was invited to attend the Province Day of the Jesuit US East Province that preceded the priestly ordination of four Jesuit deacons. I had the honour to ordain them at Fordham University last month. It was such a great joy to witness my younger brother Jesuits consecrated for God’s people. However, what I would like to focus on in this article is the opening speech of the Jesuit Provincial at the Province Day where many Jesuits and lay collaborators of the province were present.
Father Provincial did not start with a SWOT analysis of the province — assessing its strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats — the almost standard way of proceeding for organisations these days. Instead, he started with his appreciation for the different individuals and groups who have contributed generously to the mission of the province, as well as building up of the community for mission. Father Provincial provided examples of how these individuals, Jesuits, other religious and lay partners, gave and built up the mission through their synodality.
The above approach is what I have experienced as a Jesuit studying in the United States. Start with positive and affirming acknowledgement before addressing issues for amendment or development. When issues are dealt with within an affirmative and appreciative context substantiated by concrete examples, stakeholders will more likely have inner peace, positivity, and motivation to work on the issues either personally or collectively.
Contrary to that, my experience of our culture is rather different. We generally start with some courteous remarks before launching into the “issues or problems” with some critical and sometimes preachy rhetoric. We may find this rather ‘normal,’ but the effects are somewhat less constructive or lasting than those yielded within an affirmative context. Individuals and groups, especially the young ones, may find themselves less confident and more anxious about making mistakes, being ever more conservative with their efforts or even giving up trying.
Of course, a smaller number may be motivated to address the problems out of obedience, duty, or avoidance of undesirable consequences, as long as they see themselves capable of doing so. But the solutions are generally less than creative. For creativity requires risk-taking, which is not seen as desirable if making mistakes is to be carefully avoided.
The atmosphere in the hall after the introductory remarks made by Father Provincial remained focused and receptive. I could see from their body language that the audience was engaged. Receptivity is another effect that I would like to point out. The tone used by the messenger can influence how open-minded and receptive the audience will be, which in turn could affect their behaviours.
So, in general, if we want others to respond receptively to our proposals, present them in some positive tones in the forms of appreciation, encouragement, lessened risk-taking, manageable steps, foreseeable and desirable outcomes, etc. Otherwise, convoluted comments, offensively critical or condemning rhetoric, undesirable risks, or unforeseeable outcomes desired, etc., may bring out flat or negative responses from the recipients.
The latter approach appears to be commonly adopted in contemporary international and domestic politics. It is, indeed, disappointing that our ‘strong’ leaders have not adopted a more positive and constructive approach to usher peace into the world. Unfortunately, the negative approach is also the style of communication that is relatively common among family members, and parenting in particular. Should this continue to be the case, favourable and lasting changes internationally or domestically will be mostly wishful thinking.
Of course, positive rhetoric alone cannot do much to foster favourable development. A genuine attitude with empathy is also needed to sustain the credibility of the messages. If Father Provincial were perceived as an insincere diplomat, his audience would not be listening to him so readily. If we are not sincere in engaging in better relationships with others, such as intentional dialogue through active listening with empathy, deeper understanding, and looking for common ground to foster mutual development, how can there be a desirable future for all those concerned?
A humble and contrite heart delights our God. A positive and sincere spirit builds up a community.
+ Cardinal Stephen Chow, S.J.
